An ex is someone who at some point in your life was important to you and for that reason you keep memories of him in your mind.
If he communicates with you again and wants to know how you are doing this can make your feelings a little confused.
What you should know is that this is completely normal.
He may communicate with you because you have been important in his life and for that reason he wants to hear from you.
Also, if your ex is talking to you, you should consider the time that has passed since you broke up.
If you recently broke up, it is very likely that he has not yet processed the grief.
You want to know how you should respond when he asks you how you are doing.
Athough there is no instruction manual that says what the perfect answer to that question is, it's really quite simple.
It depends on how you're feeling: if you're not over the breakup and you think talking to him will hurt you, it's best to answer at another time when you feel you're ready to do it.
But if you are determined to answer him, then pay attention to these tips:
- When he asks you how you are: tell him you're fine
After answering that you're fine (even if you're not so fine inside) you can ask him back another question, such as "How was your week?”
If his answer is short it means he is not in a good mood, but if his answer is long and he keeps asking you more questions he may want to have a longer conversation with you.
1. Don't answer his questions immediately
Wait 10 to 15 minutes before answering, don't answer immediately.
Your answers should be short at first, one or two sentences are enough, because you should start very gently in this new stage of the relationship.
2. About giving positive answers to his questions.
For example if he asks you, “what are you doing?” You can say "I'm at work" (or "I'm in class").
Now you can ask him, “do you have anything interesting to do in the next few days?”
If his answer is short, you should consider waiting a few days before talking to him again.
3. Respond less than before, communicate with him just enough so that he knows you are there for him in a friendly way but not too much.
4. You can tell him that you would like to be his friend: it’s a good idea, we are sure that.
5. Set clear boundaries, explain what you want to talk about and what you don't want to talk about, friends talk about different things than couples talk about.
For example, you can say: "let's stay good friends, let's not talk about fights we had when we were a couple".
If you're not interested in hearing about his new love interests, you can say something like:
"I'm very happy that you're enjoying dating again, but don't tell me about the new girls you're meeting”.
6. Guide your conversation toward positive memories
These memories will allow you and him to remember good times when you were together.
7. If your ex says he wants to go out with you, tell him that you will meet up with other friends: he is a friend more un your life, only that.
8. If the conversation between you is very good and so deep, you can be honest with him, if you love him tell him in a roundabout way that you would like to get back together with him,you would like to get back together.
9. If he continues to talk to you a lot, tell him that it would be nice to see you in person.
We hope these recommendations will be very useful for you to have a great relationship with your ex.
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